I did a stupid thing...

I was warned.

When I went to Becky's house for 4th of July - Becky, of course, being the one who's been telling me to watch Dead Like Me - I mentioned that I had finally seen it, and I was almost done with season 2, and she said, "There's a movie. Don't watch the movie. You're gonna want to watch it, but don't. It will make you want to gouge out your eyes. It ruins everything."

But I thought, "How bad can it be, really?" So I did it. I watched Dead Like Me: Life After Death.

Holy shit, was I wrong.

It really is that awful. I know you're skeptical, but TRUST ME ON THIS ONE. Think of the worst possible continuation of the show imaginable, and then multiply it by ten, and that's how bad it is. Let's just skip to the hail of bullets, shall we?

Things I hated:

• No Rube. Who in their right mind thought it would be a good idea to do a Dead Like Me movie without Rube? Honestly, I can't blame Mandy Patinkin for wanting to stay far, far away from this dreck, but I want to know who thought it was a good idea to go ahead without him in the first place.


• Daisy. Seriously, what the fuck? I didn't think they could make Daisy MORE awful, but you know what? THEY DID IT. Y'all know I hate Laura Harris, right? The only way they could possibly have made it worse is if they replaced her with Sarah Wynter. So, of course, that's what they did. (Although I did get a tiny bit of amusement out of the fact that they played sisters on 24.) She always looks constipated, she's horribly wooden, and she has NO idea how to play a character like this.


• What was even the point of Cameron? I totally did not understand why he was there. I mean, I realize they had to replace Rube with someone, but generally you'd expect there to be a purpose behind choosing someone else. What exactly was his plan? What was he trying to achieve by leading the Reapers astray? Does he just get a kick out of evil?


• There was a lot of potential in Reggie finding out about George, and they totally wasted it. Not to mention the fact that they blatantly violated the rules - they were VERY CLEAR that George couldn't tell her mother who she was. She was literally rendered speechless when she tried, and later Rube confirms she's lost the memory she tried to share with Joy. And yet, George has absolutely NO problem talking to Reggie. Why couldn't they just have Reggie figure it out without George blurting out a bunch of memories?


• I can accept that they had to get new sets after five years, and although Happy Time was way too posh, I could've lived with it, but THEY BLEW UP DER WAFFLE HAUS! AND DIDN'T TELL US IF KIFFANY WAS OKAY! I am now incredibly worried about her.

Things I... nope, there's actually just hate here. Oh, I suppose the one positive thing about the movie was the return of the "Boom Boom Ba" song, which was totally stuck in my head for all of season 1. I missed it in season 2, so it was nice to hear it come back at the end there. But it was so not worth watching the whole movie when I've already downloaded it and can listen to it without being assaulted with horrible characterization and plot holes.

This is one of those situations where they really should've just left well enough alone. Other than Reggie finding out, I don't see how the movie adds to the show in any way (and it sure detracts a whole hell of a lot). It wasn't for "resolution" or "closure" because it doesn't leave things in any better of a place than the last episode did, and in fact introduces a whole mess (and I do mean mess) of changes that don't relate to the TV show at all.