Jack Bauer = made of awesome

Man, I've missed 24. I love that this is the only show to have the balls to say, "Yes, we're showing FOUR HOURS in two days, and we expect you to be there for all of them." And it's like - how can you resist?

So, thoughts on the first half of the two-day premiere event. I thought the whole Senate heraing thing was a little... pointless? I thought it would be longer or more involved somehow, but it really was just a chance for Jack (as the mouthpiece for the show) to be unapologetic in their portrayal of torture, which - if you haven't been paying attention - has been criticized for making torture seem like a successful tactic in combating terrorism (it's not, really). Apparently, the show is SO convincing that real-life soldiers and government agents have gotten the idea that torture actually works. Seriously, people? It's a TV SHOW. Haven't you ever heard the phrase, "Don't believe everything you see on TV"? If troops are learning torture tactics from 24, maybe that's something we ought to be addressing in, I don't know, their training? I mean, doctors don't learn how to practice medicine from watching House or Grey's Anatomy, right? (Please, God, tell me they don't do that.)

Anyway, moving on. It appears that the FBI is just as inept and mole-ridden as CTU, so I don't know that they've actually made any improvement there, but to their credit, I don't miss any of the old CTU agents yet, so I guess the FBI people are interesting enough. (It helps to know that Chloe will be back.) Janeane Garofalo was on The West Wing, which makes her awesome for life. And that twitchy tech guy they're trying to make seem suspicious? I predict he'll be killed by the real mole within about three episodes.

So, in that scene where they go to question the guy, and Agent Walker tells Jack he can threaten, but can't lay a hand on him, did anyone else think Jack should just do the towel speech thing from season 1, like, all the time? You know, the Russian gulag bit, with the "You probably don't think I could force this towel all the way down your throat, but I can," and then you start to digest it and then Jack rips out your stomach lining? I mean, holy crap. I'd be giving up the terrorists, their evil plans, and my own mother if Jack even came close to me with a towel in his hand. He doesn't need to touch people to be unbelievably scary, is all I'm saying. But I suppose it's more fun for him when he gets to stab people with pens.

Two things that made me giggle uncontrollably:
1. Jack being told to wait in the car (did anyone else have a "Chuck" moment?)
2. The look on FBI Boss' face when he realized Agent Walker was lying to him and had gone off protocol. Give him five minutes, and Jack can turn any agent into a rogue. Love. It.

I've said this before, since I've known it for a while, but it's worth saying again. TOOOOOONY!!!!! I don't care that he was dead (though nice bit with having his grave exhumed), I don't even care that he's evil (because you know he'll be working with Jack in about 10 minutes anyway). I just love him and I'm glad he's back. I miss the Cubs mug, though.